I was here when people’s clothes went missing in my yard. It started as a joke at first, when Baba Samodu’s favourite clothes went missing. He wailed and screamed, then began raining curses on whoever was responsible. Don’t ask me how we all knew it was his favourite pair of clothing. He always brought it out on one occasion, every last Friday of the month, when he was about to visit Binta. But this week, his routine was ruined. He would have to do with the other khakis in his wardrobe. No one ever suspected anything, till all our clothes began, disappearing daily, underwear’s weren’t an exception, Iya-Bola’s yellow bra went missing too, Sisi-Bako’s rope (G-string) also went missing, my favourite Barca towel mysteriously vanished, I cried that day. Messi himself used that towel. I knew about it because my brother Johnson brought it from Spain yard in Ojuelegba. Chuks, the owner of the Spain yard, my brother’s best friend, swore on the size of his manhood that it was true.
Hell only breaks loose when Lukman found his polka dot shirt on Marcus, who lived in the next street. Luku, as we fondly called him, dragged Marcus to our yard, calling him a thief. It wasn’t until Marcus entered our yard before he soon also discovered that Baba-Samodu was wearing his green chinos trousers, as Luku was screaming at Marcus. In return, Marcus was also screaming at Baba-Samodu. Later we all discovered that stolen clothes from our yard were sold to the next street. Stolen clothes from the other street were sold on our street. We all wondered who the perpetrator(s) was because they all bought the clothes from Mama-Ebube’s okirika shop.
When she was quizzed about who sold the clothes to her, she said a woman came from kontagora. She dropped the clothes at her doorstep, then the woman vanishes till another time, so we tried involving the police, but Mama-Ebube was the DPO’s lover, he told us bluntly to either buy back our clothes, or we should go to hell, we all grumbled back home. So we drew a plan on how to catch the thief. We were going to keep watch at midnights and wait for him/her to fall into our traps. But to our disappointment, all the while we stood guard, no thief came around. Even our in-house security, Benson, who worked as a daytime security guard in a restaurant, drew up another plan, the plan he kept secret, still no one was caught. Shortly after, we sighed relief, and we all went back to sleeping well. The clothes stealing began again. This time, everything on the wires disappeared. Benson was the most annoyed because his uniforms were part of the stolen. Two pairs vanished. We all felt sad for our loss but pitied Benson the most. He was going to get fired if he went to work without his uniform. So we all contributed money for him to buy new uniforms. At least everyone except Baba Samodu, that man was very selfish. No one could smell his money, except Binta, of course. But it still bothered all of us. We yet haven’t caught the culprit.
So I decided on a plan by myself. I wasn’t going to involve anyone. I simply chose to stay and watch, every night, till I discovered who the culprit was. One hot Saturday night, I saw two figures make their way to the backyard, and so I stood, waiting for the right time. As they got to the line and were about to start packing the clothes, I put on the compound lights. Lo and behold, nothing prepared me for what I saw. I found Binta and Benson, with a Ghana must go back, filled with clothes, then it dawned on me that Binta was from kontagora, which meant that she was Mama Ebube’s supplier. Immediately they saw me emerge, they both began to plead with me, asking me not to reveal their secret, each blamed the other for the crime and promised to turn a new leaf. I wondered how they knew each other, but I soon discovered that they had been lovers all the while. So I simply struck a deal with them, they should get me my Barca Towel back, or I’ll tell everyone what I saw. They agreed without them knowing that I already had their videos recorded secretly. By dawn the next day, my Barca Towel was already back on the line. I knew it was mine when I used it to dry my skin that night after a shower; Messi scored a hat trick that night. That midnight, I sent the video to our compound WhatsApp group. I woke up the next morning to the news that Baba-Samodu fainted after seeing the video. It took two buckets of water to revive him. He spent the day collecting drips at Chijioke’s pharmacy.
Benson, on the other hand, was caught while fleeing the compound, he was given a good beating and led to Mama-Ebube’s shop, after his confession, each person went in and selected their clothes back, to my regret I didn’t partake, I heard they also took extra clothing, the shop was set ablaze after, while all these were happening Mama-Ebube called the DPO, severally without any response, he blocked her number. Both Benson and Mama-Ebube were sent out of the area. While for Binta, she began dating the DPO, so no one dared touch her. She went around the neighbourhood in a police van. Baba-Samodu recovered and soon increased our rent. When we protested, he called it ‘Repayment for Damaged Properties.’ We asked what properties were damaged. He simply shrugged and pointed at his heart.
😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂
I love this storyyyyyyyyyyyy
Omo... 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂
This had me laughing out loud 😂